Lesson 5: Editing using language effectively

·         Use active verbs.

·         Control your sentence length .

·         Use simple words instead of complex words.

·         Avoid jargon.

·         Avoid abstract terms.

·         Avoid abbreviations and acronyms.

·         Be concise and clear.

·         Use topic sentences.

·         Link your ideas and paragraphs using connectives and transition words.

·         Use examples to explain and support each claim you make..

Try this exercise to help you identify where paragraph breaks will go.

http://www.aucegypt.edu/academic/writers/practice/practice_paragraphs.htm

An effective essay is crisp and succinct and it avoids waffle or padding. Examine the difference between the following. Effective editing will often reduce rather than add to an essay.

Many authors receive their inspiration for writing their literature from outside sources. The idea for a story could come from family, personal experiences, history, or even their own creativity. For authors that choose to write a book based on historical events, the inspiration might come from their particular viewpoint on the event that they want to dramatize. George Orwell and Charles Dickens wrote Animal Farm and A Tale of Two Cities, respectively, to express their disillusionment with society and human nature. Animal Farm, written in 1944, is a book that tells the animal fable of a farm in which the farm animals revolt against their human masters. It is an example of social criticism in literature in which Orwell satirized the events in Russia after the Bolshevik Revolution. A Tale of Two Cities also typifies this kind of literature. Besides the central theme of love, is another prevalent theme, that of a revolution gone bad. He shows us that, unfortunately, human nature causes us to be vengeful and, for some of us, overly ambitious. Both these books are similar in that both describe how, even with the best of intentions, our ambitions get the best of us. Both authors also demonstrate that violence and the Machiavellian attitude of “the ends justifying the means” are deplorable.

(215 words)

Authors may gain inspiration from history — where they describe, interpret and dramatize it from their own viewpoint. Both George Orwell’s Animal Farm and Charles Dickens’ Tale of Two Cities express their disillusionment with society and human nature. Orwell wrote Animal Farm in 1944 as a social criticism and satirical comment on the Bolshevik Revolution — showing farm animals revolting against their human masters. Dickens’ Tale of Two Cities uses the French Revolution to show how human nature is vengeful and often too ambitious. Both books describe how our ambitions get the best of us and that violence and the Machiavellian attitude of the “the ends justifying the means” are deplorable.

(110 words)

Example taken from: http://www.write-an-essay.com/editing-your-draft-essay.html

Here is a simple essay writing checklist you can use for any subject or course.            

ü      or  x  the box.

1) Structure

ٱ Topic sentence of introduction answers the set question/states the thesis

ٱ The introduction lists the reasons in support of thesis (at least 3)

 These reasons are:

ٱ There is a concluding statement for the introduction

ٱ The body consists of several paragraphs

ٱ Each paragraph begins with a topic sentence

ٱ Each paragraph indicates a new point

ٱ Each point is elaborated upon

ٱ Each point is supported with an example and/or quote

ٱ The conclusion reiterates the thesis

ٱ For discussion essay only – The conclusion makes a recommendation based on evidence in the essay.

2) Language                

ٱ It is written in the present tense (unless it is about an historical event/issue)

ٱ It is written in third person or a mix of third and first person

ٱ Educated vocabulary is used. List 2 examples

ٱ Complex sentences are used. List 2 examples.

3) Conventions of English

ٱ Proper nouns and the beginning of each sentence use a capital letter

ٱ The title of the text is underlined each time it is mentioned (if an English essay)

ٱ There is subject-verb agreement

ٱ There is correct spelling

ٱ Speech marks/quotation marks indicate all quotes

References are given where material is not original

ٱ The essay is written in paragraphs.

4) Content

ٱ There are a number of examples to support each point made

ٱ There is clear and thorough knowledge of the text/subject matter

ٱ The main themes/issues/ideas/concepts are presented in detail

ٱ A range of quotes or other supporting evidence is used.

Useful vocabulary for essay writing

Connectives

on the other hand

similarly

yet

unlike A, B ...

in the same way

but

while both A and B are ..., only B ..

nevertheless

on the contrary

though

despite

however

conversely

while A is ..., B is ...

after, afterwards, after this                                            

for this reason

it follows that

as a result

subsequently

simultaneously, concurrently

first, second, third, etc.

next

then

following this

finally

because

however

consequently

Web Resources on Essay Writing

http://www.write-an-essay.com/links-page.html which is where this list is located.